She sits. Staring at her phone. Hair blowing. Face warm from the setting sun. She bites on gold painted nails. Looking out to sea. Nail polish chipping. Chipping away. It tastes like... nail polish. Chemicals. A deep breath. Distracted. She spits out bits of gold, wiping her tongue with the back of her hand. She looks. Stares at the chips of gold on her skin. Little specks. Her mind wanders.

"What are you doing that for?"
"It looks nice."
"Who's the guy..?"
She makes a tonal sound with a shrug that translates through from Australian to English as "I dunno." An excited scream comes from the doorway and her little brother runs in.
"Hey you! How you doing? Hey? Come here.." She smiles and forgets her worries for a little while. Rubbing his belly like you'd rub your dog. Making it laugh and pant and bark. He squeals. "Ow my nail polish!" Setting him to one side she continues to paint each nail. Fixing up the marks and mistakes.

Biting her nails again, she looks up out to the guys in the water. She thinks she sees her brother wave from the cluster of black suited men. Maybe she'll go out one day. Maybe. Sitting there at the lookout the sun setting and water all around, she daydreams. Starts to think of other places she could see. Places where she could be. Places she's only heard of but never travelled to. She's never even had a passport.

Her brother's out of the water coming up behind her dripping wet panting cold water splashes onto her face. He gives her a huge hug and she squirms. "Come on." He forces a smile out of her. He hugs her and teases her like you'd tease your dog. Making it laugh and pant and bark. She squeals.

"How was your party on Friday?" She answers again with the tonal song and shrug of "I dunno." "You don't know much do ya?" He laughs and pushes her in the direction of the car. Windows down cool breeze music scratching out of the old speakers. She sits in the passenger seat hugging her knees to her chest. Staring out of the window. Thinking. Let's the music calm her body but her mind still chips away at her. Her fingers scratch at the nail polish.

The party was fun. Nothing happened to note. She had a few drinks and smiled and laughed when she thought she was supposed to. Everyone danced. She did too, but she wonders if she did it right. Her best friend went off into another room with a few people, but she didn't want to. The night was still. Stars were out. Everyone seemed to know what to do except her. She kept looking down at her nail polish. Sparkling. It said "Be wild. You're awesome!" It didn't help much. Before heading out she'd drawn her eyes with eyeliner. Didn't know if she did that right either. A guy from another school asked if she wanted to take something, but she shook her head. Holding onto her elbow, covering her stomach. Wishing she'd worn the black top instead. Around midnight she took a bottle of vodka from the esky and walked off across the street to the beach. No one noticed her go. Sitting at the beach sipping on the metallic, harsh alcohol, the voices disappeared along with the goosebumps and she stared up into the sky. The milky way was clear. And so she sat there. Lost in the stars for a while. She went back when someone called out her name, but most people had gone home by then.

Looking at her brother driving next to her, singing to the sounds of his favourite band, she wanted to ask him. Biting her lip, stomach tense. Heart full but chest tight - she wanted him to say yes. Would he think she could do it? He noticed her looking.

"What's up?"
"I want to come out with you one day. Would you teach me? To surf. Would you teach me?"